I miss my full time job. I really hope to go back. Thinking about how we'd handle childcare is so stressful though because of our crazy work schedules. Then there's the dilemma that all working moms of young children face, am I a bad mother for choosing to work instead of choosing to stay home with them full time? Am I a bad mother for letting somebody else take care of them while I work? I can't win. Can any woman really win? I want to make everybody happy, but I can't. I'm not the best homemaker in the world, so I feel like a failure at that. If I want to make myself happy then I'm considered selfish. If I put everyone else's happiness before mine, then I feel trapped and resentful. I wish there truly was a way to be a super mom and have it all, career, kids, family, hobbies, and have nobody suffer. I don't think that's realistic though. Lately I feel guilty for taking the time to train for the marathon. That's a huge heartbreak because running and exercise are peaceful for me. They take away my stress, but it's hard for people to understand that sometimes. Oh well. I'll figure things out in due time. I am just feeling yucky right now.
TOTAL MILES: 0
Managing Hydration When You Are a Runner
5 years ago
5 comments:
I know what you mean. I couldn't bring myself to work, because I had kids for US to raise and not a daycare. Then, when I was with them 24/7 I was getting depressed!!! I agree that mom's are put in a bind and are judged either way.
Here, I have found a nice balance thanks to putting them in preschool. I have the mornings to myself from 8 to Noon. They get to go play with their friends, and so do I...LOL.
I can relate to what you are saying. Sometimes I feel like I'm a failure at everything I do and wanting to just move away to another place. That is when I tell myself, "you are where you're supposed to be, Jojit! Just be grateful."
Being a man, I guess I am not the best to comment. But being a father of 2 (and a husband) maybe I can drop a note.
Why, because I share my life with a great women who, just like you, wants to be the perfect super mom. Every week, she asks out loud the same questions you do. Guess what? There is no simple solution.
The best thing is to enjoy every moment you are with your kids, but also enjoy every moment you have to yourself (like when you are out running).
My wife has a chronic disease (lupus) and fragile health, so it was (and still is) hard for her to admit she will not be perfect all the time. But in the eyes of our 2 girls... SHE IS PERFECT AND A SUPER MOM! And she actually started running 2 months ago. I pushed her that way a bit, so she go find some inner peace by herself, let everything go.
You know what: she will probably get to Boston before me!!
BryanK
"There once was a Big Guy"
You must be a GREAT mother! The fact that you worry about it, shows how much you care!
As your kids get older they will see all the sacrifices (AKA decisions- that's what I like to call them)
Keep trusting in the Lord and he will let you know when it's time for you to go back to work.
I'll pray for a pick me up for you!
gladys
Lillie, like Country Cruiser said, the fact that you're concerned shows what a top notch mother and person you are. You'll find that happy medium that gives everyone some of your life and time while still preserving some for yourself. You're absolutely justified in keeping some Lillie time in your life. You may give up some of it for a few child raising years but it'll pay big dividends. Don't give up all of it though.
YES .... a woman can win and you're a winner. You may not make everyone happy all of the time but nobody does. Do your best and keep your OWN happiness in the loop. You'll be a better Mom and person if you're happy as opposed to being depressed.
Remember we're here .....
Ray G.
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