Giving Thanks

I had such a great week. The hubby, the kids and I flew up to Idaho to spend Thanksgiving with my hubby's sister and her family. We had the best, most relaxing time. It was FRRREEEEZZZING up there and I loved it! Lows in the mid 20's and highs in the mid 30's. I ran Thanksgiving morning and it was 28-degrees. I thought my nose was going to burn off from the freezing cold. I had to cover it with my gloved, right hand for the first 1/2 mile or so, and then it was fine. I felt no pain anywhere! It was like running with ice packs on my body only with full range of motion. Good stuff. It snowed while we were there, but the snow didn't stick until the day we left. :(
We played lots of games: Texas Hold 'Em, Rummy Q, Are You Smarter Than a Fifth Grader, etc., etc. We watched some entertaining movies: Hancock and IronMan. I loved IronMan!!!

We ate a TON of food everyday. Oh, my clothes are tight! I drank some great local wines and even had shots of JAGERMEISTER... the headache that stuff produces is unreal. Ugh.
I so enjoyed the time with my family. I loved that we were all together under one roof for so long and yet we all got along beautifully!!! I am so thankful for their love and that God makes it possible for me to love them. Truly a blessing. I know that my family's love for each other is an extension of God and Christ's love for us. It feels so good to know that in my heart and in every fiber of my being.
Whether or not you believe in God or a higher power, or even if you don't... no matter! But be sure to love. Love your family and your friends and just treat your fellow human beings the way you'd like to be treated. We can make the world a little sweeter just by doing that simple thing.

I hope you all had a great Thanksgiving! I know I need to work off a lot of grub. :)

Slow Going

I needed to do something physical today.

I put the little guy in the jogging stroller and we went for a little run. I am back to square one. I can't believe how beaten up my body is. Really. I jogged very slowly and it still felt uncomfortable. We did 16:00, then walked 3:00, then 10:00 of jogging, then walked 2:00, then jogged the rest of the way home.

3.11 miles in 34:56. I know that's close to a 12 minute mile. Oh well, it's something. I wasn't breathing hard or anything, but it sure didn't feel comfortable in my legs. It'll get better with time.

Dear Friend

I am so sorry that you had to feel your pain alone. You always seemed like such a strong person, so self assured and definitely not one to give up without a fight under any circumstance. I've learned that even the strongest person has their weakness. I am saddened and completely shocked that you are gone. I know you were a tough person, and I know you kept your personal life personal and I respected you for that. I know you loved your husband and that your face lit up when you talked about him, and I respected you for that. I admired you. Your work ethic. You were yourself, or so I thought. You were a tough one to crack, but when I got to know you I realized just how friendly a person you were. When you did something only ONE time to hurt my feelings, although inadvertently, you went out of your way to follow up with me and made sure I knew you didn't mean any harm by it. And I understood and I appreciated your effort, and I never lost respect or admiration for you. We did not see each other often, but when we did you always treated me like an old friend whom you were happy to see. I only hope I made you feel the same way! I really liked touching base with you, even for just a few minutes. I'm sorry you felt so alone. I'm so, so sorry. I wish I would have known. Many of us wish we would have known. I worry about your husband. I hope he's okay. Although you were a private person, it was obvious how much you cared for him. Dear Friend, I will remember you. I will pray that you are at peace and feeling comfort now, and that you no longer feel alone in your troubles. I will remember your style and your personality and your grace. I will remember your smile. You saved your smiles for certain times, and I feel lucky that I got to see it as often as I did when we were in each other's company. I will pray for your husband... that he feels your love, always. I will remember you!

And the hits just keep on coming

I am not kidding. I have had test after test after test thrown at me. First the ankle, then the anaphylaxis, then the ankle again, then 10 days ago a cold that turned into a sinus infection and now... I kid you not, my back is done, out, finito. I have had lower right back pain radiating to the hip and through to the front, kind of by the groin. It's horrible pain. The frustrating thing is I'm not sure where it came from.

I haven't been exercising for the past week because it's harsh on the back. I've been taking anti-inflammatories that do NOTHING, I've been resting. I've even spent a day laying down. I now keep a heating pad on it almost constantly. Nothing helps. Pain is constant. If I really felt sorry for myself I'd say that God is playing a cruel joke on me. But I know that's not the case. He's telling me that I can plan to run or race or do this activity or that all I want, but he's got the final say. And right now he says, "Ha! Fat chance, GB, fat chance."

The last thing I remember doing where I felt my back seriously tweak a bit was running the 30K on Nov. 9. The back has kind of bothered me off an on since, but it became debilitating earlier this week. If it's not gone by Monday, I'm going back to the doctor. I sure hope and pray that 2009 is healthy for me because the last few months of 2008 have been a huge bummer. Huge.

I can't remember...

I can't remember the last time I felt free during a run. Felt peace. For a long time now I've been running under the stress of performance. How's my pace? How's my heart rate? Is this going to help me during my next race? Blah blah blah blah. Now that I'm forced to not run at all I am also forced to rehash all that went wrong with my running. It's gonna be a long process, but I'll get back to basics soon. I'll get back in touch with why I began running in the first place... because it made me feel GOOD.

Things happen the way they're supposed to. God has let me know that in no uncertain terms. Now it's about going with the flow.

Epiphany

I had one today as I attempted to run a 30K for 'training.' 18.6+ miles, a distance I've run a trillion times before, should not have hurt as much as it did today. Let me back up. I have not run for 8 days, not one step. I have cross trained like a fiend, going super hard on the stationary bike, elliptical and also pool running hard. Those workouts were so, so challenging and I know they keep me in great cardiovascular shape... but NOTHING can prepare me for running as much as running itself. And there in lies the epiphany.

Yes folks, my experiment was not a success. It was quite a failure as far as running goes. But I learned quite a bit out there today. I learned that I'm through feeling sorry for myself and that I'm at peace with my injury and the need for me to not run fast for a long time. I learned that Clarksburg, CA is a pretty little winery town situated along the Sacramento River. I learned that there is no reason to get upset when runners in their 60s or runners who literally weigh twice my body weight pass me on the race course. In fact, I found that so inspiring! It felt good to look over at them and root them on. I learned that I am so blessed to be able to enjoy the outdoors and physical activity, like I did today. There are people all over this world that can't walk, can't leave their homes, can't even fathom the idea of physical exercise let alone run. Either due to injury, illness, disease, what have you.

As I plodded along in the last 5-6 miles of the 30K, watching dozens of people pass my sorry, limping booty, I felt thankful. Competition comes from a latin word that means "to seek together," and I reminded myself of that today when I was able to just look around at all the runners: old, young, fast, slow, skinny, overweight, male, female. We were all out there seeking something better for our lives TOGETHER! It was really amazing to think about.

Now, onto the nitty gritty. I felt some nagging ache in the foot/ankle early on, but then I seemed to get into a groove and even ran several of the miles at a cruise tempo pace. The aches were still there, but not so bad that I couldn't continue running. Then at mile 10-1/2, the sharp, acute injury pain came out of nowhere! Like a cyclone hit. Even walking fast made it hurt. That was the beginning of the end for me. And at that moment, I said, "Just do what you can to enjoy the rest of this race." That being said, I tried to DNF (did not finish) at mile 11 and again at mile 15, but the sweet people at the aid stations said if I wanted a ride back, I'd have to wait until they shut their stations down and it would be a long wait. I actually asked spectators if they'd give me a ride back and they were there waiting for runners to come by and didn't want to leave. I don't blame them! Anyway, I knew my hubby and youngest son were waiting for me at the finish and I didn't want them to worry so I just kept going. I mostly limped, and when I was able to 'run' it was more like a hobble-jog.

I saw my family just before I got to the finish line, and it was the happiest moment ever! I hugged them and then hobble jogged to the finish.

My coach ran the 30 K as a workout, and it turned out that his workout paces were faster than the fastest guys racing, so he won by over a minute and a half! The general manager of the running store where I work part time also ran today and he got third in his age group and placed 6th over all. That is no easy feat because the guys out there today were fast! Seriously fast, like 5:00/mile fast.

My friends Kim and Toxie ran so well. Kim won the 20 mile race (women's division) and ran very fast, and Toxie came in third in his age group (and about a minute ahead of Kim). Outstanding!

Well, I'm going to go back to cross training, but also include a few days a week of easy running along with a long run at an easy pace. I think my body and foot are so 'dead' because I ran that distance after taking over week off (and because I'm injured anyway). So now I know my body does not do well on a plan like that. I like experiments! :)

P.S. I got a lot of compliments on my outfit today... of course, a running skirt from www.runningskirts.com, a matching tank (also from rs.com) and knee high compression socks. I think it was the socks & the skirt combo.

Happy Birthday to my dear DAUGHTER!

I love you always!!!